If you’ve ever been dumped, ghosted, overlooked, or just deeply humiliated in public while trying to hold your life together with dry shampoo and delusion—Kiersten Lyons has written the book of your dreams.

Crushed: The Boys That Never Liked Me Back is a perfectly chaotic, laugh-so-hard-you-snort memoir that proves two things: heartbreak is universal, and humor might be the best survival tool we have. From the first page, Lyons invites us into a world that’s half romantic comedy, half emotional horror show—and somehow still feels like a hug.

Here’s the setup: Kiersten is tying the bows on her wedding invitations when her fiancé announces he’s been cheating. Not just anywhere, but at The Magic Castle, which, if you’re unfamiliar, is basically Hogwarts for aging Los Angeles magicians. If that detail alone doesn’t make you spiral into a cackle, you may want to check your pulse. But the wildest part? Her ex goes on to win $100,000 on a reality show six months later. Meanwhile, Kiersten’s life is... not going according to plan.

And yet—this book is not a pity party. It’s a celebration of every painful, messy, ridiculous thing that happens when life does not turn out the way you scripted it. Lyons has the rare gift of making you feel seen and completely entertained at the same time. She writes with the neurotic charm of Nora Ephron, the spiritual chaos of Glennon Doyle, and the comedic sharpness of Mindy Kaling. And still, her voice is completely her own.

Every chapter unpacks a new “Crushed” moment—from the boy who didn’t like her back in seventh grade to the Hollywood dream that just wouldn’t click to the quiet heartbreak of watching everyone else thrive while you’re just trying to survive. But don’t expect misery. Kiersten spins each disappointment into pure comedic gold, often pausing mid-meltdown to offer the kind of insight that makes you laugh, cry, and text a friend, “You have to read this.”

What makes Crushed shine is Kiersten herself. She’s raw, yes, but never performatively so. She’s self-deprecating in the best way—not to fish for compliments, but because she’s constantly pointing the joke inward before it can be turned on her. And the result is not just funny—it’s disarmingly vulnerable.

By the end, you’ll want to hug this book. Or better yet, have a three-hour brunch with it. Kiersten Lyons doesn’t promise easy answers. What she offers instead is solidarity: the comforting reminder that none of us are actually alone in our heartbreak, our spirals, or our slow climb out of the mess.

Crushed is a joyride through rejection, and somehow, you’ll come out of it feeling stronger, seen, and maybe a little less sad about your own Magic Castle moment.